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Monkey see Monkey do

Monkeys, for a long time missunderstood creatures who where often looked at by man as an inferior version of himself. Well I thought there are a lot of inferior humans out there so the chances are that there is going to be some exeptional monkeys somewhere. So moving quickly not giving myself time to think I set out on my quest to find a monkey elite. On a whistlestop tour of the tropics I assembled a group of Simian genius but that is another story. With my collection of monkey from around the world I was ready to get them monkey to work but how?

Having no time or actualy being bothered to read up on previous research on Primate behavior I tried my own unique brand of hit and miss system of geting my monkeys to preform simple tasks on command. The technique I developed in those early days was what I now call the "Marshall technique". Basicly this works on the Monkey see, Monkey do theory. This involves taking your monkey through the task that you want it to preform step by step, carefully pointing out the key steps in each task hoping that your monkey will imitate your actions. I have found that the best results are to be had when your instructions are followed up with a heavy sick or, if you can get one a rubber cosh*. The beauty of monkey training is that once you have a monkey preforming a task you'll never have to train it again and if that monkey has any sense it wont have to go through training again.

*loads of monkeys were killed and harmed during my experiments, oh the bodies, how they piled up the smell, the horror of it all.